conquering the world one oxymoron at a time
Archive for January, 2006
January 31, 2006 at 2:28 am · Filed under tv/movies
I remember going with my dad to the public library every single weekend when I was little and getting a stack of books to read for the week. The only things that I didn’t read were books that I had already read. Nothing bothered me more than to read a book the second time through. For this reason, I never bought books until very recently. Why spend money buying books when I have no intention of ever looking at them again after one read-through?
One of the first books I ever bought was Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice; I loved it so much that it never fit the “only read 1 time through” mold. I have now read P&P more times than I can count. Still, through every read, no matter how many have already come before it, I long for Lizzie and Mr. Darcy to be together, and I flip the pages as fast as I can to find out, in great anticipation, when they do. I never get tired of the story.
Naturally, I am equally enamoured with the various big screen adaptations of the book. The lastest, with Keira Knightley, is beautiful, albeit a bit rushed. After all, how can one truly do a book justice in 120 minutes? Today, I just finished watching the BBC miniseries adaptation; it made me want to go back and read the book again, if at least to read the few pages of Mr. Darcy’s infamously rejected proposal and his subsequent letter. The miniseries even elevated Colin Firth to dashing/hot in my mind.
Watching P&P instantly put me in a great mood. The warm fuzzies I inevitably get after reading/watching P&P each time are indescribable. The story is so genuine, so touching, so sweet, so romantic. I am sure all girls have, at one point, wanted a handsome Mr. Darcy of her own. The misunderstandings in the story, followed by everything smoothing out in the end, give us all hope in the fateful turns of events in our own lives. They allow us to trust that things will all work out in the end :)
January 30, 2006 at 11:28 am · Filed under music
And if I had a boat
I’d go out on the ocean
And if I had a pony
I’d ride him on my boat
And we could all together
Go out on the ocean
Me upon my pony on my boat
- Lyle Lovett, If I Had a Boat
January 30, 2006 at 12:32 am · Filed under music
So, so you think you can tell Heaven from Hell,
blue skies from pain.
Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?
Do you think you can tell?
And did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
And did you exchange a walk on part in the war for a lead role in a cage?
How I wish, how I wish you were here.
We’re just two lost souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year,
Running over the same old ground.
What have you found? The same old fears.
Wish you were here.
- Pink Floyd, Wish You Were Here
January 26, 2006 at 11:22 pm · Filed under grad life/MIT
Philip, who was up here visiting two weekends back, asked me today if he could pose a question to me. He said it was something he’s been wondering about, but is kind of awkward. Finally he said “When I was up there a couple of weekends ago, I noticed something in your closet when you were getting sheets out for me. Do you have a large fishbowl of condoms in your closet?”
Here are the four reasons Philip came up with for why I would have a fishbowl of condoms in my closet: 1) I got it as a gag gift, 2) I was stocking up because after all, I have been telling him about a lot of guys who have shown interest lately, 3) my parents sent them to me, 4) they’re left over from Ryan.
Okay, reason #3 is just plain weird, but none of the others are right either. Thanks for having such a wild imagination, Philip. Do I really seem like the type? Only reason #1 is even worthy of a response from me, and no it was not a gag gift.
I do have a fishbowl full of condoms in my closet. It contain condoms of all shapes, flavors, textures, and colors (like black). All GRTs can pick up a fishbowl of condoms to provide to our students however we see fit. I think some Tutors leave condoms in jars outside their door or something. I have just opted to throw that bowl of condoms in my closet. I did talk to all my freshmen about responsibility and the importance of safe sex.
The condoms do make for a good shock for people when they look into my closet; the sheer number of them is enough to stop most people cold. Philip was so shocked he was too embarrassed to even bring up the subject while he was here. Finally, his curiosity got the best of him today, and he just had to ask.
***Addendum: Phil’s reaction to this post***
Philip: and no you don’t seem like the type … i figured i must have been mistaken
me: you thought it was candy. a fishbowl of candy wrapped in condom wrappers
Philip: i thought that only because, while i was asking, i realized how crazy it is. That there’s no way you would have a bowl of condoms
January 26, 2006 at 1:56 am · Filed under random
what’s hot: silver cuff links ==> what’s not: gold chain links
what’s hot: shaggy hair ==> what’s not: back hair
what’s hot: shirt top button undone ==> what’s not: button-fly undone
what’s hot: cheese & wine ==> what’s not: cheesy lines
what’s hot: gazpacho soup ==> what’s not: gaucho pants
what’s hot: tall physique ==> what’s not: tall ego
what’s hot: stitch photography ==> what’s not: stitched-up knee
what’s hot: brainy wit ==> what’s not: brainless twits
what’s hot: dreams coming true ==> what’s not: waking up to the truth
January 23, 2006 at 11:46 pm · Filed under friends, grad life/MIT, dating/relationships, daily grind
because there always are aftermaths. Some directly result from the event, and others seem completely unrelated.
1) I felt like a queen this weekend. I will be eternally thankful for all the caring friends who went out of their ways to bring me movies, ice cream, beer, groceries, conversations, and some altogether well-spent quality time. I feel no less grateful to everyone who left comments, phone messages, and/or sent emails expressing their condolescences and offering to help in any way that they can. I truly am a lucky gal.
2) I am much happier now than I was last May about some life choices. This subject really deserves its own entry. For now though, it will remain a joyful afterthought.
3) I am already tired of a relationship that doesn’t even exist yet and will most likely never be. The games have gone on 2 months too long. I need to accept that “he’s just not that into me” and move on. I want to tell him how I feel, so that I will have no regrets or thoughts of “what if?” later on … but what I really NEED to do is to stop wasting time/energy on him and move on because he’s just not that into me. He is just not that into me. Repeat. Repeat.
4) I did not call my parents when the accident first happened (they were not one of my 2 phone calls … ), and I mentioned nothing of it when I called them yesterday. I don’t want them to worry unnecessarily (of course they will), and I don’t want them to have their hearts in their throats every time I tell them I’m going snowboarding/skiing from now on. I feel guilty that I have not told them yet, but I don’t know how to bring up the subject.
5) I am signing off of IM for an indefinite period of time. This actually already happened, since I haven’t really signed on since last Monday. While I enjoy catching up with friends, I inevitably stay up until 5am doing nothing except chatting on IM, and I always hate myself for it. I don’t like hating myself.
6) As calm and accepting as I am about what happened, I do ask “why me?” I am extremely thankful for how relatively well everything turned out, but I really could have gone on, perfectly happily, without another major scar on my knee.
January 20, 2006 at 3:07 am · Filed under daily grind
Good news first. My friend from high school just had a baby. She isn’t even the first: we have another fellow Class of 2000′er who became a father in September. Granted, these are both Mormons, but as Aziz Ansari put it best “please stop having babies you people! It makes the rest of us feel old!”
Bad news second. This week, someone up there somewhere is playing a game called “Let’s see how many times Shan can injure herself.” I sprained my ankle badly Saturday night. My first thought was “would I still be able to snowboard?” By the time Tuesday rolled around, I was up on my feet and walking around, so I went snowboarding. Only to re-sprain my ankle. Today (Thursday), I went back for more snowboarding, and finally got everything I ever asked for.
Warning: the following may be graphic … ? (though I wouldn’t really call myself a graphic writer)
Here are my discrete recollections of the events that transpired tonight: Conditions are icy. I am not a good snowboarder. I am made even worse of a boarder with my bad rental boots. I change my boots. I still do not like ice. I fall a lot. Other people around me are also falling a lot. With my good fortune, other people, who happened to be riding my tail, have no time to react when I fall. I look up the mountain just in time to see a guy coming down on a board inches from my face. I duck. I feel sharp pain in my right leg. The guy flips over me. I grab my leg in pain. I lay on the ice, unable to get up. I lay for a long time. Pain subsides.
I try to get up. I see blood. Lots of blood.
I lay back down, elevate my leg, apply pressure, call for help. (or rather, my friends Leonardo and Cathal and Barry call for help). Thank goodness for friends who stayed with me on the mountain. Leonardo, Cathal — I cannot thank you guys enough; you are truly rock-stars. I’ll owe you guys beers any day of the week.
Ski patrol arrives. They roll back my ski pants. I see a 3-inch-long gaping hole in my right thigh (like a gushing mouth, the Ski patrol later describes). I want to freak out. I’m on the verge of freaking out. I elevate my leg some more. I feel dizzy (loss of blood?). Ski patrol dress up the gaping mouth in my leg. At least I get to ride down the mountain on a stretcher-on-skis thing. I get carried on a bus bound for MIT. I make two phone calls (guess the two people whom I called). I go with ambulance to the hospital. My high school friend whom I drank with on New Year’s Eve happened to be my EMT in the ambulance.
Nurse in ER undoes my dressing, asks me to bend my right knee (to “check” for broken ligaments, she says). I feel blood gushing. She is satisfied. Doctor reveals my wound. flesh literally dangles out of my leg. Doctor numbs my leg with what feels like lemon juice on gaping wound (the irony of anesthetics is that they only work after first inducing severe pain). I watch as the good doctor douses my leg with iodine, saline, and whatever else, and goes to work. I watch as the good doctor cuts away at “extra flesh”, punctures my skin repeatedly with his suture needle, and ties knots using suture thread and what looks like two pairs of scissors. I no longer want to freak out. Things are under control. I feel like I am watching Nip/Tuck.
15 stitches, and some forms where I signed giving away my soul, later, I am discharged. I need to wear a knee brace for two weeks. I can’t do anything that requires bending my knees for two weeks. I can’t exercise for next two weeks (to my get-fit team, I am so so sorry). I can’t snowboard anymore. GSC ski trip is in 8 days. 8 days is less than two weeks. I get no ski trip.
Good news last. I am overally a-okay. I had some wild thoughts running through my head tonight, such as how unfortunate it would be if I were to lose a leg at 23. Luckily for me, the cut, despite being extremely wide and deep, did not hit anything major. I should be back on my feet in about two weeks.
I cannot express enough gratitude for: Leonardo, Cathal, Ryan, Zach (and his EMS team), Linda the nurse (even if she made me bend my knee), and Dr. Shaffer. Thanks for making it so I didn’t freak out, and so that I still got to keep my leg.
January 19, 2006 at 1:59 am · Filed under going out
33 drinks in 2 days, and these are the only pictures we have to show for them …
January 16, 2006 at 9:39 pm · Filed under friends, going out
Philip, an old friend from UVA, visited me this past weekend. It was a weekend of birthday dinners, salsa dancing, sprained ankles, fraternizing with the Blue Man Group, Dr. M, ghetto rabbits/frogs, meeting ee of ees, chopsticks, stalkers, spheres, trying not to watch 24, pittsburgh & carolina, beers with 9.5% alcohol content, keyboards, clam chowdah, cab drivers who don’t know their way around, glamour shots, and a whole lot more alcohol than we should have had.
The highlight of the weekend was probably us hanging out until 2:30 in the morning with Meridian and Shaneca of the Boston Blue Man Group. In addition to being incredibly talented percussionists, actors, dancers, performers, they’re also just a couple of super sweet, laid-back guys who know how to enjoy the moment and have a good time. Many thanks to Billy, the Charles Playhouse Lounge bartender/assistant manager for introducing the boys to us!
The highlight residual of the weekend has got to be the list of toasts that we now have. Every drink that Phil and I had, we drank to something. We tried to keep a record of all of them (which became quite difficult sometimes), and in turn documented the people, the events, the jokes, and just how much we actually drank in 2 days…
the things that phil and I drank to this weekend:
1. to 1 out of 30
2. to getting phone calls from people we like
3. to tillett - teaching us what not to do in the future
4. to getting wet on saturday night (get your mind out of the gutter)
5. to bouncing hug checks
6. to never giving up - restoration ball 2006
7. to moving up on shan’s list of guys
8. to the monkey
9. to being above ground and sucking on the grass roots
10. to bartenders
11. to making every hour count, every minute worthwhile, every second last
12. to blue men
13. to yushenkov’s poison
14. to shankar’s shot
15. to meridian & shaneca
16. to old flames
17. to not speaking chinese
18. to looking good with black
19. 2 years 2 long
20. to monkeys and frogs and rabbits
21. to not being taken
22. to listening to your heart but following your brain
23. to jaeger
24. to another jaeger, and-in phil’s case-to finishing karen’s drink
25. to stroking the f-key
26. to being admired, but never loved (so depressing, but probably true)
27. to greatness and bitterness
28. to being/getting on top
29. to not being desperate … and still drinking triple sec
30. to sexing it up with Maxim (by Phil)
31. to not talking
32. to always having fun and having limited responsibilities
33. to shan being naked in public*
* clarification: this didn’t actually happen; we just drank to it **
** further clarification: shan did not endorse this toast. she lost a bet ***
*** author’s note: yes, shan does speak about herself in the third person
Thanks for coming Phil; I had such a blast!! Next time, we will go for the nation’s capital :)
January 13, 2006 at 2:03 am · Filed under music
Searching around google in order to place “Afterlife” chronologically into Jump, Little Children’s music career, I came across this review of JLC’s show in Atlanta during their Farewell Tour this past fall. Reading this review immediately brought me back to New Year’s Eve: during a respite from drinking, my friend Ryan told me, through tear-filled eyes, the emotions behind the Dec 30th Jump show at Dock Street. Not unlike the emotions described in the review.
This naturally led me thinking back to the 29th, when I trotted down to Dock Street with friends myself (we weren’t cute enough to score Dec 30th tickets). I remember having my arms in front of me, on top of the old theater’s bannisters, with my chin on my arms, mesmerized . As song after song flowed from the stage, bits and pieces of the last 6-8 years of my life flashed before my eyes.
From dancing with My Guitar during our monthly dances in the Assembly Room, to the Govie compilation CD that I still have, to swaying in a circle of friends during Cathedrals at Jump’s Underdog Tour kickoff, to a first date, to awkward family friends at my first Dock Street, to shared interests with an English major, to anniversaries, to the black hole that is Boston, to weddings, but most of all to the dear friends who introduced me to JLC and with whom I have shared the music ever since.
If I were to make a soundtrack of my life from 11th grade to present, it would be full of Jump songs, not because the lyrics necessarily apply to my life, but because I associate very specific songs to specific events and life segments. Now that Jump has likely played their last show ever, I find that my soundtrack is ending too. Just before Christmas break, I remember telling a friend that I think the older I get, the more I feel that I have out-grown Jump. I said that I felt most of their fans are teeny-boppers, and because my fan-ship really grew out of high school when I was a teeny-bopper, I am losing touch with Jump.
After I said that, I felt like a traitor. I am glad that Dock Street completely threw my logic out the window and proved to me that I still love JLC as much as ever. However, I think the source of my love has switched from “I like their fun sound” to “I like the emotions and nostalgia their music invokes.” Inevitably, the end of Jump, Little Children leaves me feeling empty. How could I not? Someone just pulled the plug on the soundtrack of my life.
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