At a party last night was the first time I had seen some friends in maybe a couple of weeks. Unfortunately, I wasn’t in a mood to put up a lot of the usual bullshit I do when I’m around them. That’s not to say that I don’t enjoy spending time with everyone, but honestly when you haven’t seen someone in a couple of weeks, the first things you ask are small-talk type of questions: how is everything? how’s work? what’ve you been up to? And I think I just wasn’t in the right mood for that kind of banter.

The only conversation I had that even began to break the surface, I had to end, because I had to go find someone whom I had invited out to the party. That made me sad, because I think I actually enjoyed that conversation. It was probably my favorite part of the night. Everything else was just everybody standing around drinking and throwing jibes at each other. I’m not usually quick-witted enough to contribute anything; last night was particularly bad. I wanted to just crawl into a hole and go to sleep.

Beyond the bantering, I think I’ve also just reached the limit of shit that I can put up with. That limit is definitely different for different people with whom I interact, but certain people just really have a knack for pissing me off. If I liken my temper to a teapot of water, I feel like it’s been gradually steaming up for the past week or so, and it was pretty much on the brim of boiling Saturday night, and one thing led to another led to steam shooting out of the teapot. Change the characters/personas around me last night, and the water may have never boiled.